“When you give another person the power to define you, then you also give them the power to control you.”
― Leslie Vernick
In class, my teacher talked about healthy relationships and said, “It’s sad how some women only feel happy when they are in a relationship. Women need to learn how to entertain themselves instead of waiting for a man to do it for them. It’s not healthy for a woman to seek out her self-worth through a man”. For example, it’s an issue when a woman doesn’t feel pretty unless she has confirmation from her boyfriend.
If I'm being honest, the idea that I need a man in order to be happy has affected me in the past. Luckily, I was able to change that mindset which has positively impacted my life. I now know that I can live a fulfilling, happy, and successful life on my own without depending on a partner to get me there. I am not saying that I am an independent woman that DOESN’T NEED a man, but I am an independent woman that IS CONTENT in being on her own. HOWEVER, having a man is a wonderful bonus that can be added to my life.
Women too often get involved in bad relationships and stay there due to the belief that she is not good enough to find a better man, or she needs her partner in order to feel “complete”. Co-dependency is very unhealthy because it requires approval and acceptance from a significant other in order to be happy. This can lead to abusive relationships, financial dependency, and emotional distress. Before getting into a relationship it is essential for a woman to learn self-love and how to be content on her own. This type of confidence will attract the right kind of man which will prevent co-dependency and it all starts with the improvement of self-esteem. As beautiful women that deserve happiness, we need to:
Acknowledge our strengths as well as our weaknesses
Learn how to produce self-joy and feelings of completeness by ourselves
Entertain ourselves by going out and doing things we enjoy and have a passion for
Seek comfort in the fact that the Lord will always love us
Find inspirational scriptures in the bible or quotes online that relate to any relationship or self-worth issue we may have
Remind ourselves that anyone would be lucky to have us and we don’t NEED a man in order to complete our lives